No Absolution
by everybreatheverymove
Summary: What happens when April returns to Seattle? Set following 9.01
1. Chapter 1

**OK, I really couldn't help myself and, besides, if you've seen the synopsis for the third episode "Love the One You're With" you know what I mean when I say couldn't wait 3 weeks for that.**

* * *

**No Absolution**

* * *

"April!"

The redhead whips around to see Meredith down the hall, a smile erupting on her face as she spots the younger woman. She heads down the path, immediately engulfed in a hug.

Meredith pulls away slowly, "What are you doing here?"

"I got my job back. Dr. Hunt gave me another year to work hard and study for my boards against and... I'm going to pass this time."

"That's great! Hunt called you?"

"He, uh, came to my home. All the way to Ohio, no one's ever gone that far to make sure I take a job." She chuckles, shrugging her shoulders.

With a nod, she suddenly realizes, "Oh. Oh, he went to see you." She'd been curious ever since she'd seen him at the airport and Cristina hadn't been aware of his departure from the hospital. She didn't know because he didn't go to see her, he went to retrieve April.

But it's okay. It is, because she's an important part of the place, and she deserved a second chance or, well, a third.

"You're an attending."

Meredith smiles again, "Well, a fellow, but I know! It's- It's good to have you back. Are you starting today?"

"Yeah, I have to go find the Chief, do you know where he is?" She asks, a hopeful look on her face. She doesn't want to have to wander down the halls of the hospital by herself because, if she did that, she'd be sure to cross people, one person, that she didn't have the nerve to face at the moment.

"I think he's in the ER. But, uh," She waves her pen about before slipping it into the pocket of her coat, "You should go find Jackson, I'm sure he'd be happy to see you."

April bites her lip, holding back a nervous laugh, "Yeah, yeah. I should. I really... yeah." She scratches the back of her head.

Meredith grimaces briefly before brushing off the girl's strange behaviour. Shouldn't she be happy to see her best friend again? They were, like, each other's person.

"I'm going to go. I'll see you later."

"Welcome back."

At least one little thing is back to normal.

* * *

"Chief?"

The man turns around, a proud expression on his face.

She stares up at him expectantly, "Where do you need me?"

Owen checks down on his iPad for second , scrolling through a list of patients and schedules.

"You're on Plastics today." He tells her, "Something easy to get you started."

She knows it's not easy. Jackson had told her numerous times when she joked that he'd only chosen the speciality because it was simple procedures and easy money.

"OK. Who's the new Head of Plastics?" She asks.

He'd told her about the passing of Mark Sloan and she'd let the information slowly sink in. It was ridiculous, losing so many people in such a small amount of time. He'd seemed in recovering shape for the first month after the crash, but apparently his condition had worsened and he'd been stuck in a coma for a month before time had ran out and they'd had to turn off his life support.

It was ridiculous.

And she can't begin to imagine how Jacks-

"We don't have a new Head yet, so Avery is taking over most of the cases." He smiles down at her and pats her shoulder before handing her the charts that she'd be needing for the day. He'd put her on her best friend's service so it couldn't be so hard to do, right? "Simple mammoplasty. Have fun."

She stares down at the file for a moment, and rolls up the sleeve of her white coat to check the time on her watch.

Great, just wonderful. The one person that she didn't want to have to face was meant to be supervising her for the day.

It was ridiculous.

Just a few short months ago, they'd both been fifth years, preparing for their Boards. The same exam that she'd screwed up by letting the sex they shared and the nerves of failing get to her head. The exam she'd failed and now here she was, three months later, under his teaching.

It was ridiculous.

"Perfect."

* * *

"Ms. Peters, how we feeling today?" He asks as he steps into the room, clicking his pen as he walks.

The woman in the bed smiles up at him, clasping the hand of the man in the chair beside her.

"Good." She pulls her robe closer to her body, a slightly shy look on her face.

April suddenly appears in the room, carefully dodging Avery as she slides past him to the edge of the patient's bed.

He stares over at her, a confused frown on his face. Why hadn't Hunt told him that they'd working together?

She seems different. Her hair was different, lighter. Her skin was paler, softer locking. Her body was-

"Hi, I'm Dr. Kepner and I will be assisting Dr. Avery on your procedure later today." She smiles down at the woman.

"April-" Jackson starts but finds himself cut off by the patient's fiancee.

The man grasps her hand tighter, "It's an easy operation, right? She's not going to like die on me, or anything?" He asks, a half joking-half anxious grimace.

Jackson smiles, "No, it's- it's a simple procedure. Everything will go smoothly."

Ms. Peters glances down at her body when April speaks again.

"I read you recently lost 100 pounds, yeah?" She nods, "Okay, and you're here for breast reduction surgery, correct?"

"Did you not read the chart?" Jackson asks her, a mildly irritated look on his face.

"I read it, I was just making sure that it was right." She replies, a cold look on her face as she stares back at him.

He'll drop it because she looks like she's going to murder him or something.

"Yes." Ms. Peters answers her question finally, her fingers toying with the strings of her robe. "Yeah, it's- We, uh- It's kind of a big deal."

April smiles at her genuinely, pulling her chart against her chest. "Can I ask why?"

She's always been curious about her patient's stories, Jackson notes as he glances from the woman to his patient.

Her fiancee squeezes her hand reassuringly, and she speaks, "We've never had sex. And he's- You've never seen me naked." She turns to the man, sending him a loving smile. He returns the look, kissing the back of her hand. "But... that's about to change."

Jackson shifts, stuffing his hands into his pockets as he smiles gently.

Wonderful.

April tucks a strand of hair behind her ear and glances down at the floor for a second quietly.

"I just didn't feel confident, you know? And it- uh- it didn't feel right."

"It should." Avery suddenly speaks, but quickly stops himself when April turns her attention to him, raising an eyebrow and waiting for him to continue, "I mean... it will. It should feel right. And feel good." He talks quietly that she barely hears him.

"You must think I'm a freak." She laughs to herself and the man beside her places a hand on her cheek.

"Stop."

She nods and bites her lip, noting the way Kepner does the same.

"Nope." She breathes out honestly, "I don't- I don't think you're a freak." She tells them, "I think it's sweet. It's nice that you waited, because you wanted it to be perfect, right?" They nod and she smiles, "Yeah, it'll... I don't think you're a freak."

She doesn't because she's been in that same situation two years before, people thinking that she's freaky and weird for not having sex sooner. Jackson included. But that had all changed when she'd finally had enough and had practically jumped him because it seemed like a good idea at the time, because it seemed right, and good, and intended to happen.

"Thanks."

April nervously toys with her pen, and Jackson smiles at the couple, "We'll see you later to get you prepped."

He follows her out of the room, sliding the chart across the nurses' desk. She walks away from him quickly, trying to avoid him. It's not like it'll be possible anyway because they're going to be stuck in the operating room for over two hours together so she can't ignore him forever.

"April!" He calls after her and she turns around on her heel, staring straight at him dangerously.

"What?"

He walks closer to her, "What- What are you doing here?" He watches her face as she sighs, licking her lips and running a hand through her hair.

"Hunt gave me my job back." She tells him.

"That's great." He doesn't seem too upbeat but she can't blame him. He probably never expected to see her again.

She notes the way he looks different; his hair's grown, his eyes are darker and he looks tired. She figures it's because he's lost his ex-girlfriend and his mentor within the sake of three months and he's got the extra job load.

"I'll see you later." She tells him simply before turning away and walking off.

He stares after her, a confused expression on his face. He stayed in Seattle for a reason; partially for Sloan, but mainly for her. Because he wanted to be there for her. But she just went and left him, cold and alone. He'd literally woken up one day to find gone, the only remainder being a note to tell him and Alex that she'd moved back to Ohio.

She'd left him.

* * *

"Apes, welcome back!"

Alex appears behind her, patting her shoulder a couple of times before sitting down across from her and beside Meredith.

She smiles at him, "Thanks."

"Held back, huh?" He jokes and Meredith nudges him when she sees April face.

"Yeah, I guess so." She sighs and runs a hand over her face, "It's weird."

Meredith takes a bite of her salad before speaking, "I'm sure you'll be fine. You're working with Jackson, right? That's gotta be easy."

"You would think."

Meredith doesn't push it anymore because her tablet lights up, revealing Cristina's face across the screen.

"Lunchtime at Seattle Grace. Good times." She speaks and April creases her forehead in confusion.

"Is that Cristina?"

The screen is turned around in her direction and Cristina smiles, "Kepner! You back from the farm?"

"Yeah."

"Good to see you, Virgin Mary."

The redhead lets the comment slide, instead placing a grin on her face, "How's Mayo?"

"Weird. They're all a bunch of lunatics. Hey, you'd fit in well here."

"Thanks, I guess."

Meredith spins the camera back around, "What are you doing?"

"Charting the most boring cases ever. I swear, it's not even worth it sometimes."

"You know, you can always come back." Meredith suggests and Cristina shakes her head.

"Mer, I've told you to let it go. Hey, how are Evil Spawn and Pretty Boy?" She sees Alex in the corner of her screen and cheers, "Hey, loser."

"Whatever. You still suck for leaving."

April shakes her head. Yeah, she's missed this.

* * *

It passes faster than she thinks.

There's an awkward silence in the room for most of the time and nobody quite understands why.

"You need to bring down the skin that was above the areola to reshape, okay?" He asks her.

The only speaking that they've done in the last two hours is about the surgery, is him teaching her.

"Right."

It takes her a while longer than it would him but she manages and he smiles.

"Okay, good job."

April stretches her hands, "I don't know how you do this, it's incredibly difficult."

He smirks, realizes that she's starting up a conversation to rid the silence, "And you never believed me." He teases and she giggles.

"I believed you, I just thought that you were exaggerating."

Jackson smiles, watching her face turn into a foolish grin as she picks up the scalpel and hands it over to him. His hand lingers over hers for a second before he takes the sharp object slowly and continues working.

She observes him for the rest of the surgery.

* * *

"It should be a fast recovery, so don't worry." Jackson tells them, watching his patient as she stands from her bed and walks over to the mirror in the room.

She nods at his words, "Thank you."

He smiles before leaving the room. He glances at his watch, noticing the time, 1.00 am. No wonder he's so tired.

Everything's all filled out and his patients are cleared, or stable at least, so he guesses a quick nap break would do him good.

He quickly pushes open to an on-call room, thankful that he didn't walk in on Alex and another one of his interns. Again.

Jackson shuts the door behind him, leaning his head back against it for a second and closing his eyes.

A soft voice interrupts his peace and he snaps his attention back to the beds, noticing the woman on the bottom mattress.

"Jackson?" April mutters, moving herself into a sitting position.

He sighs. _Great._

"Yeah," He replies, rubbing a hand over his face. "Yeah, I just- I'm gonna go." He goes to spin around to open the door but her voice stops him.

April stands up, stretching her arms behind her, "No, it's fine. Stay. I was just leaving anyway." She leans down at the edge of the bed to retrieve her shoes.

"You were asleep." He points out.

She shrugs, "Yeah, but I probably shouldn't have been. I have a lot of work to do. Can't fail again."

A short moment later, she bites her lip nervously when she realizes what she'd said.

He glances up at the ceiling for a second, "Can we just... talk about it?"

"About what?"

The way she always changes the subject or tries to steer the conversation away from the one thing that they have to discuss frustrates him to no end. The fact that she went to Ohio and left him to deal with it all by himself didn't help.

"April, you know what I'm talking about."

She takes a deep breath, crossing her arms over her chest. "Yes, I know, okay? I get it. I had sex. We had sex. I'm no longer a virgin. I get it. It was really, _really_ good. It was great. Sex was good. I get it, Jackson!"

"No, I don't think you do!" He steps closer to her, shrinking the space between their bodies. She finds her back straightening when his hand finds her hip and tugs her body nearer to his. "You don't get it. I'm not guilty, I'm not sorry."

She gulps when his hand travels up her side, remembering the way he'd touched her that first night. It'd been good, great, perfect. Somehow, within all the mess and nerves that had been floating from her that night, he'd managed to make the whole thing perfect for her, to make her forget about the awkwardness or the aftermath of what would ensue.

The short distance between them closes and she feels the back of her head touch the edge of the top bunk.

He's sending her that intense look again, the one that she hasn't gotten out of her mind ever since the first time.

"We shouldn't..." She can't bring herself to finish her sentence because he grasps her hips and presses his front against hers.

He smirks, "That didn't stop us last time." He reminds her.

She goes to reply but finds her speech cut short when he runs a hand up her back as he presses his mouth against hers hungrily.

April moans out quietly, her fingers clawing at his scrub shirt. He slips it off quickly, briefly cutting off their contact. Jackson slips his hands down to her bottom, picking her up and she wraps her legs around his waist tightly.

Her hands find the back of his neck, her fingers toying with the hair as he lays her down on the bed, his lips finding her neck.

* * *

She rolls over a while later, finding her naked body colliding with his own under the thin sheets of the hospital bed.

He looks so peaceful when he sleeps, and she wonders how she could have kicked him out of bed the first time. Maybe she wasn't sure about the idea of sleeping in the same bed as the man who'd just taken her virginity. Maybe she wasn't sure how the conversation would go once they woke up.

Maybe she just wasn't ready.

But she's had two months to think without seeing him, without having him beside her was strange, being back home, on the farm when she'd grown up. She wasn't used to it anymore. Hunt was right.

Seattle was her home.

The hospital was her home.

And her best friend, the man who she'd finally let sleep beside her, was apart of that home.


	2. Chapter 2

She officially moves back into their apartment a few days after she returns.

It's different, messier, but she figures that two single grown men were living there alone so it can't have been tidy for very long.

Alex helps to move her stuff, bringing in the heavy boxes through the front door while Jackson is at work. They both have the morning off and it seemed like a good time to get it done, get settled and back to their routine.

"Ohio, huh?"

April lifts her head, fiddling with the t-shirt in her hands before she picks up a hanger, "Alex, what are you doing?"

"Trying to have a conversation." he tells her simply, opening up a box and pulling out a photo album.

"We don't have conversations."

He stays in silence for a second before shrugging his shoulders and nodding his head, agreeing with her, "Good point." He flicks through the book, spying the photos.

The first few pages all display pictures form her childhood. She's little with a bit grin on her face as she holds a baby pig. He chuckles to himself and continues on, eyeing her personal memories. There's a page full of pictures of her and some other people. People he recognizes. They look kind of old because she has brown straight hair and she has the same appearance of when she first arrived at Seattle Grace, after the merger.

"Lookin' good, Kepner." He teases and she turns to see him holding the album with a smirk on his face. She quickly rushes over to his side, trying to pull it away from his grasp.

"Alex, give me that."

He nudges her away gently, flipping the page to see a picture of her and Reed. He remembers the girl vividly; she was hot, kind of annoying and she needed to tone down the attitude.

She falls mute next to him, her finger tracing over the picture. "I, uh- I remember that night."

"Yeah?" He quips, a small smile on his face.

She nods, "Yeah, it was the night after our first shift. We'd been up for two days straight and I remember all she wanted, we wanted, to do was go out and get drunk." She tells him and she reminisces.

They'd been interns back then. Fresh, young and new. She'd been assigned to a resident called Dr. Richards. Reed, Charles, Jackson, and two other interns that had flunked out, had all been under the same supervision. the guy was mean, cruel, and she laughs at the nickname Reed had given him: Blowfish. It was a stupid name really but he was incredibly round faced and bodied and always made puffing sounds like a fish.

"Check it out, I found Avery!"

He tilts the page towards her and she smiles at the picture.

"Oh, my God." She gasps.

It's of her, Jackson and Charles. The same night as the other pictures of Reed. They'd had a few drinks, _one too many_, and too say that she'd been sufficiently drunk was an understatement. She'd gotten into a fight with another intern about something stupid that she doesn't quite remember. It'd been quite similar to her fight at the Boards actually, only she'd pulled the girl's hair instead of punching her in the face. Charles had given her high-five with a cheer while Jackson had bought her the strongest alcohol he could find. Reed suggested that they take a picture to _remember the moment._

She had taken the picture while Charles pulled the redhead against him, placing an arm around her shoulders. Jackson stood behind her, placing a hand on her hip as she wrapped her arm around his neck from the front with a smile on her face.

She now notices the way that he looks down at her in the picture. He has this admiring grin on his face, yet it's somehow serious like he's trying to protect her.

"You guys always were weird."

She glances back up at Alex, her eyes trailing on the picture for another second, "What?" She squeaks, unsure of what he's talking about.

"Come on, you guys are like freakishly close. Admit it, you've got the hots for the guy. Always have."

April stills beside him, quiet for a moment before taking the photo album from his grasp slowly and throwing it down on her bed. "I don't- No, I don't."

He smirks, raising an eyebrow as he continues to unpack her stuff, "Yeah, that's why you've always been so clingy to him." He jokes and she frowns.

"I honestly don't know what you're talking about. We're friend, best friends. I guess we're close because I became his friend instead of anything else."

_Not that Reed hadn't told her to make a pass at him or anything._

"Whatever." He brushes it off, taking a look at his watch. "Hey, we gotta go."

She abandons her clothes, searching around the room for her purse and phone.

They leave the apartment a few minutes later, and he doesn't bring the subject up again.

* * *

"How's the new Chief Resident?" Meredith asks as she sits down, Jackson following her lead and taking a seat beside April.

She swallows her food, "Already doing a better job than I ever did."

Jackson shakes his head, "You did fine." He tries to reassure her, turning to Meredith and Alex, "Right?"

"No." Alex speaks suddenly and Meredith kicks him beneath the table. "Ow!" He glares at her, stuffing a chunk of his meal into his mouth.

"You were... okay. It just took you awhile to get used to it." Meredith tells her, a smile on her face.

April shrugs, "Whatever. You know what, this year, I'm just gonna study and focus on my Boards and... that's all." She speaks confidently, tapping her hands down on the table but she bites her lip after a second. "Oh, crap." She quickly gets up, pushing her chair under the table before she takes off.

"What the hell?" Alex creases, a confused look on his face.

"She forgot her post-op."

Meredith eyes Jackson, "How'd you know that?"

He grins before standing up and picking up his tray to dispose of it. "I'm just that good."

As he leaves, Alex turns to his friend, "Don't you think they're acting weird?"

"They're always like that. You live with them, not me." She reasons, casually avoiding the topic. "How's the new peds guy?" She asks.

* * *

Good, she was okay. April thanks her stars as she leaves her patient's room. She can't screw up this time and now checking up on her patients would be a big no-no.

She steps onto the elevator, pressing the button to the fifth floor and crossing her arms over her chest. She closes her eyes and sighs.

This is hard. Starting over. Granted, it's only one year., but it's a year that, four months ago, she'd never planned to have to redo. She hadn't planned on failing. She hadn't planned on losing everything.

But she can do this, she can get back up again and sort her life out.

She has to.

The elevator dings and she opens her eyes as Jackson steps in. He brushes past her, their shoulders grazing, and stands a few feet behind her.

"Oh." He leans over and presses the button for his floor, sixth, carefully letting his hand touch hers.

She takes a deep breath of air when he steps closer to her.

"Stop it." She warns him, the tone in her voice confident.

He smirks, "I'm not doing anything."

She shakes her head with a smile that he can see, "I can feel your breath on the back of my neck." She whispers quietly.

Jackson moves closer, leaning his head down towards her neck, and whispers in her ear, "I have no idea what you're doing talking about."

She stills, "Jacks-"

"I'm not doing anything wrong." He cuts her off, placing a hand on her right hip and tracing his thumb softly against her skin under the light material of her scrub pants. "Am I doing anything wrong?"

April tilts her head and closes her head when he presses a kiss on the side of her neck. "No." Her hands remind by her sides for a second as the elevator rings.

Forth floor.

He leans past her and swiftly presses the Stop button, bring the elevator to a halt. She quickly turns herself around, grasping the sides of his face and pushing her lips against his desperately.

Jackson smirks against her mouth, gently thrusting her against the wall and she links her arms around his neck as his tongue enters her mouth.

He pushes up the edges of her top, gingerly touching her skin. April moans out and shifts herself, before pulling away.

"This is weird."

He completely understands but it doesn't change the fact that it's amazing at the same time. It's only weird because they've been friends for so long and she's never pictured herself as one of the people that does this.

"You think so?" He asks her, his voice clearly rid of any sincerity. He pushes her hair aside and kisses down the side of her throat to the top of the material of her scrub shirt.

April trails her hand down his back hungrily, wrapping a leg around his behind as she presses herself up against him. His finger run through her hair and she grasps the back of his neck, pulling his lips back down to hers after he pulls away for a breath.

He smiles against her, his hands holding her thighs in place as she jerks her body, making him smirk.

Jackson tears himself away, slowly letting her down onto the ground and she sighs heavily.

"Yeah... I'm still not used to that." She tells him honestly, tidying her hair up and he presses the button again, allowing the elevator to start back up.

He runs a hand over his face and sighs, "Yeah. Me neither."

She readjusts her shirt, and pulls her hair up into a tidy ponytail.

As they finally reach the fifth floor, she places a quick kiss on his cheek before leaving the space, biting her lip as she turns to look at him.

"See you later."

He watches her as she wanders off, the smirk on his face wiping off when Webber joins him in the lift.

* * *

April makes it home around 11 pm and closes the door shut with a slam behind her as she enters the apartment.

Where is he?

He'd finished at 9, and Alex had told her that he hadn't seen him at Joe's, so she figured that he must be at home.

She throws her stuff down on the side and walks off to her bedroom. She changes into a pair of shorts and tank top, and ties her hair up before walking into the kitchen.

Pulling a bottle of wine out of the fridge, she turns abruptly when the front door slams shut again and Alex stumbles into the hallway, a leggy blonde on his hip. She giggles against him and he groans as he pushes her into the bedroom, throwing the door shut close behind him.

April shakes her head with an unbelieving smile, some things never change.

She makes her way to Jackson's room, making sure that Alex is no where in sight as she slowly pushes the door open and steps inside, pulling it to a shut behind her as she goes.

"Are you trying to get caught?" He asks and she spins to see him sat on the edge of his bed, a shirt no where in sight. He has that cocky smirk on his face again and she nervously smiles.

"I- No. He's- Alex has company so... we don't have to worry about that." She informs him, reaching a hand behind her to lock the door with the key.

He watches intently as she puts the bottle of wine down on his bedside table and pulls the stopper out, placing it down beside the glass.

She switches the lights off, letting the lamp illuminate the room.

"April, what are you doing?"

She ignores his question, instead walking in front of him and placing both hands on his shoulders.

"We're going to have sex." She tells him casually, as though it's a common occurrence for them, for her. It's becoming one, though.

Jackson grins when she pulls the bun from her hair and lets the red tangles fall down her shoulders. "Oh, really?"

"Yep."

He places both hands on her hips and pulls her closer to him, and she smiles down at him, biting her lip again.

"You sure you wanna do this?" He asks her, careful.

They've done this before. Quite a few times now and he's not sure that she's completely sure of herself, or positive that this whole thing is what she wants.

She has beliefs and she's betrayed that faith before, and he remembers the first two occasions where she became worried and anxious afterwards. She has beliefs that he has no idea how to handle, and he doesn't know know if she can handle breaking those promises. Again.

"I'm- I've come to terms with it, with everything I thought I was and turned out not to be. I had two months away from you to figure everything out, to decide if I wanted to be judged for something that was considered wrong. And I didn't, no matter how long it may take me to move past everything I used to believe in. Things change. I've changed." She reassures him, a small blush covering her cheeks when he reaches up to brush of strand of hair behind her ear gently. "You changed me and... I'm fine, Jackson, really."

Jackson stares up at her, "OK."

She leans down, pushing against his shoulders so he lays down on the bed. Her legs find his sides and she straddles over him and he grips her waist, holding her body into place.

Her fingers trace the toned shape of his chest as she gazes down at his face. He watches her back cautiously, his stare turning to relish when she grasps the edges of her tank top and pulls it over her head and drops it down onto the floor. He routes the palms of his hands up her thighs carefully, catching her attention again.

She barely has time to notice before he flips them over and hovers above her. Her face slightly flushes and he leans down to kiss her lips, tracing his thumb over her bottom lip slowly afterwards.

April squirms under him when he runs his hands down her sides, stopping on her legs. She pulls her knees up at his sides and quietly cries out when his tongue slips into her mouth again and she finds herself clawing at his shoulders.

* * *

She wakes up sometime later with the sudden need to use the bathroom.

His arm's wrapped tight around her waist, pulling her back against his front. She tries to wriggle out of his grasp, groaning when he only brings her closer and mutters out.

"Stop moving."

April grins as she turns her head to glance at his half-sleeping form, "I have to pee."

He lets go reluctantly, flipping himself back over onto the mattress and flinging his arm over his face to block out the early morning sunshine.

"Hurry up."

She giggles as she leans down to retrieve her underwear and t-shirt. She slips the items back on and paddles her way over to the door, careful to not make much sound. It's 4 in the morning, and Alex should be up soon for work, and she really doesn't want to have that conversation.

She unlocks and quietly opens the door, only making it past the door frame when it's all over.

"Hey, Kepner." Alex calls out as he rounds the corner from the kitchen.

_Crap._

She's stood in front of Jackson's open door, clad in only her underwear and small t-shirt. She figures the situation looks pretty obvious.

"Hi."

It only takes him a second and a quick glance into the open room to know what's happening.

"Hold on..." Alex speaks as he points towards the door and then to her.

A smirk works its way onto his face and he nods his head with seeming approval.

"Damn, Kepner." He shakes his head, the smug look on his face still apparent as he walks away, a hot cup of coffee in hand.

April groans, throwing her head back and leaning against the door frame.

"Crap."


	3. Chapter 3

He only asks because he's curious, and he's not sure that she's fully moved on from the matter.

"Do you want to get married?"

She pulls a face, staring up at him confusedly.

"Wh-What?" She asks.

Jackson shrugs, "That's it, right?" He starts to reply, "That's why you've been weird all day? Did Meredith speak to you?"

"No. Why, what did Meredith do?"

He shakes his head and closes his eyes briefly, "She just... said some things. No, you know what? Never mind, it's not important. I'll just- whatever." He stops, frowning for a second and turning to leave.

April rests a hand on his shoulder to stop him and he spins back around to her again.

She smiles, faintly, "It's not... _that_. I told you, I'm fine with it. But it's just when- When I'm here... I have to focus and I- I can't be near you." She explains, glancing up at his face and watching the way his face contorts hurtfully, "Or I might..." She trails off, biting her lip for a second and his expression changes when he looks down at her.

"You might what?" He grins, placing a hand on her hip and shuffling closer to her.

April fidgets against him, pushing her shoulders back and avoiding eye contact with his face, that amazing face of his that makes her do bad things. Very, very bad things.

"I might..."

He stares at her and she dares to glance up into his eyes.

Gone.

Her lips press against his roughly as his arms clasp around her waist and she wraps her own behind his neck. He lifts her up slightly and moves her backwards, her back colliding with a file cabinet. She doesn't care though, instead she moves a hand up to grasp the back of his neck and bring him closer to her if possible. His hands travel down to her bottom and she runs her fingers down his chest, playing with the edge of his top.

She smiles against his lips when he starts to remove the white coat she was wearing and runs a hand through her hair.

Jackson pulls her up and she wraps her legs around his waist again, her arms flung down his back as he leads her over to the couch in the corner and shrugs his scrub top away. She smirks and slightly blushes when he rests above her, a smile on his face, "What?"

"Nothing." She replies, shaking her head and softly gasping when his hand slips beneath the material of her pants.

* * *

"Kepner!" A voice calls out to her over the tablet and Meredith turns the object to her. Cristina's grinning face appears and April mentally curses, "How's the sex?"

"Great, now Cristina knows?"

She chuckles on the other end, "Word travels fast. Just like your pants."

Trust her to make a lousy joke, even Alex hadn't reached that low just yet. In fact, he'd barely said anything.

"I wouldn't say 29 years was fast." Meredith pipes in.

"Whatever, they were always freakishly closer before that. Let's call it 25."

April frowns, "I can hear you!" She stuffs a piece of watermelon in her mouth and shakes her head unbelievably.

Jackson suddenly appears at her side and sits down, "What are we talking about?"

"Cristina is making fun of me. Again. But, whatever, it's nothing new!" She screeches and he laughs.

"Yang, stop it."

"Oh, please, pretty boy, I'm not even started on you yet." She informs him and proceeds to comment about he clearly couldn't get any anywhere else before Meredith says her goodbyes and disconnects the call.

She shuts it off and places it back down. "She's happy for you, really."

April fake smiles and nods, "Yeah, sure."

* * *

Alex puts his top into his locker and pulls out his fresh one to return home in.

"So, you and Kepner, huh?"

Jackson turns to the guy, "Yep." He declares proudly, "Why? That's not a problem is it?" It' not that he cares, he just doesn't want the guy on his case every day and night complaining about them.

"Dude, a problem? Really?" He asks with a raise of the eyebrow and a smirk, "I'm just happy you're both gettin' some. God knows she's way too uptight and you needed to get laid."

"Don't be making comments."

Alex shrugs, "Whatever. Kepner's crazy, by now I've kind of learnt to deal with it and you clearly tone that crap down, which is good. Better for me. How can I complain?"

He nods and throws his bag over his shoulder. "Good, because I really wouldn't want to have to beat the crap out of you again."

"Dude, just don't be doing that crap all around the apartment."

"Don't be such a douche." He jokes and Alex grins.

They've come a long way.

* * *

"Your mother is in town." April tells him as she leans over his shoulder from behind.

He turns his head with a frown and asks, "What? Why?"

"I don't know. Webber just told me."

He shudders and shakes his head, "Great. This again."

She looks up at him curiously, "What again?"

He pulls her aside, "You know at the boards? When we were...? Well, Webber was... doing my mom." He tells her disgustedly. The idea only repulses him because it's his own mother and his former Chief so he's exactly sure what to think.

April gasps and covers her mouth with a hand, "Oh, Jackson. And- And you didn't know she was coming?"

"Do I look like I knew?"

She peeks over his shoulder and spots his mother approaching. "She's, uh... here."

He turns around and groans. "Hi, Mom."

"There's my baby boy." She shrieks and rushes over to him, clasping his face in her hands and placing a kiss on his cheek.

"What are you doing here?" He asks her, a hint of annoyance in his voice.

She smiles, "Oh, Richard asked me to scrub in on a surgery."

April stiffs a laugh beside them, "I bet he did."

Catherine Avery eyes the girl with a smile, "What was that, dear?"

The redhead straightens up and stutters, "Uh, I- Nothing."

"April, honey, I heard about the boards. Are you okay?" She asks out of sincerity. It's a known fact that Catherine's always been interested in the young woman's life, one part in particular. Well, that was going to be awkward.

"I'm fine." She smiles and brushes her hair behind her ear.

"And how's the..." She starts and leans closer to whisper, "Sex?" She pats her shoulder, "Are we there yet?"

April crosses her arms over her chest and bites her lip with a mutter, "I'm fine."

Jackson interrupts, "Mom, why don't you go find Dr. Webber? I'm sure he'd be thrilled to see you."

She seems to listen as she turns to walk away after hugging her son a last time.

As much as it sickens him, he'd rather have his mother in Richard Webber's hands than April being uncomfortable in her presence.

"Are you okay?" He questions, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

She nods after a moment, "I'm good. I've really good. I'm still confused as to why your mother always seems so interested in my sex life but apart from that I'm great."

He chuckles and wraps an arm around her shoulder.

"We'll be fine. Do you want me to tell her?"

She rests her head against his shoulder and leans on him, "No. It's- How about we just don't say anything? I really don't want to have to talk about how I lost my virginity to her son after she was the one encouraging me to have sex in the first place." She explains and he nods, placing a kiss on her forehead.

She can only begin to imagine how that conversation would go._ Hey, remember when you told me to have sex? Well, I jumped your son. _It's a bit more important than the conversation you share over an open body or a lunch table.


	4. Chapter 4

**Seriously? Can't wait for the next ep! Thanks so much for reviews, hope you keep reading!**

* * *

"Dr. Karev?"

Alex turns around and grins down at his intern.

"Yeah?"

Jo Wilson flicks open her folder and checks something on the sheet before speaking, "It's about Reed Kennedy... your kidney transplant." She finishes for him when he pulls a face, clearly not recognizing the name of his patient.

He watches the way she flips her hair behind her shoulder and raises her eyebrows when he doesn't reply.

"Yeah?"

"Can I... scrub in?" She asks, partly shy. She'd been courageous and bright when she'd arrived, but Seattle Grace Mercy West had put quite a damper on her attitude. She was less upbeat and more scared of everything, after hearing about everything that had gone on in the last few years at the hospital. Crashes, shootings, deaths, ...

The list was growing endless and she wasn't sure how to handle herself because one day she could be doing sutures and the next, dead on the hallway floor. It was insane, she'd never heard about anything like that. No one had ever mentioned those things in med school, maybe because they were uncommon for most places, as they should be.

Alex crosses his arms after taking a bite of his apple and smirks, "You wanna catch a drink?" He asks her, mouth full of fruit.

She frowns, "Are you serious? You've slept with all of my friends and I have no interest whatsoever, anymore," she recalls the week before when she'd attempted to make a pass at Dr. Torres, "to get involved with my superiors.

He liked her. Not with, like, feelings, or anything. He didn't do that anymore, because every time he did, he ended up getting beaten and bruised.

"Fine."

She smiles and thanks him before walking away happily, pulling her hair into a ponytail.

He watches her as she leaves, his eyes trailing on her ass with that same smirk.

A voice pops up beside him and he notices April in the corner of his eye, "She's your intern."

"Whatever. Why don't you go find Avery?" He teases and walks away, crunching down into his apple again with a chuckle.

The redhead shakes her head and huffs. He'd never learn.

* * *

"Your girlfriend's pissing me off."

Jackson pulls his jacket over his shoulders and spots Alex as he enters the locker-room. "What?"

"Kepner! She keeps giving me crap for trying to sleep with Wilson."

Jackson grins and picks up his bag from the bench, "She's right though."

Alex frowns and shrugs off his comment, "Whatever. No wonder you never slept with anyone else when she was gone. You're whipped." He jokes and Jackson frowns.

"I am not."

"Dude, you are. Only _you_ can handle all that farm-girl Jesus-loving crazy-chick crap."

He contemplates his words for a second before admitting his fate, it was true. He couldn't help it and, as cheesy and as foolish as it sounded to him, he loved that he was the only one who knew how to manage her crazy mood swings sometimes.

"Yeah." He replies slowly, getting lost in his thoughts.

Alex grins and shakes his head from the other side of the room.

Whipped.

"Hey, you heading home?"

Jackson nods and pulls his keys, "Why?"

"Just so I know when I head back later."

"Right. See you later."

As he leaves the room, he runs a hand over his face. His mother had been grilling him all day about his love life, and if he was feeling OK, and if he was alright with all the work that he had to do by himself now that Sloan was gone.

Of course, he'd replied that everything was perfect, and he'd carefully avoided the topic that he knew she was trying to pry into.

"Hey!"

April appears beside him and lowers her voice when she stops in front of him, placing her hands on his chest.

"Your mom wants to talk to me." She informs him with a scared look on her face.

He glances around for the woman, "D'you want me to stay?" He asks her. He's not going to leave her to chat with his mother about him, and her, and them, and... _that_. He's pretty sure that April wouldn't be able to control her words and she'd end up telling her everything.

She shakes her head and takes a deep breath, "I'll be fine."

"Yeah, you'll be fine. I mean, she can't know, right?" Jackson tries to reassure her. He's not an idiot, he knows that someone's going to have said something to his mother.

"Yeah... you don't think somebody told her, do you?"

He doesn't answer so she sighs.

"Oh, crap."

Jackson pulls her into a hug, wrapping his arms around her waist. "Hey, you'll be fine. I can stay if you want."

"No, you go home."

He smiles down at her, "You sure? She's not the easiest to have a conversation with."

"Yeah, I know. Last year's talk wasn't the best." She shrugs and pulls away, "I'll see you later."

"Bye." He places a quick kiss on her forehead before heading out.

* * *

"You OK?"

He closes his eyes and pulls his legs up to his chest. "I've got to be."

She nods, patting his knee for a moment with a sad look on her face before she decides to diverge the conversation, into a slightly happier theme, just maybe not for him.

"How are the happy couple?"

Alex stares at her in utter confusion, "What?"

Meredith smiles, "Jackson and April. Not annoying you yet?"

"Dude, I gotta leave. I pretty sure I broke the volume on the TV because she was so loud."

She laughs and rests her head back against the wall.

They just gotten out of surgery and Alex had slid down the wall beside the OR door with grief. They'd lost him, the little boy. He was only seven, he'd barely lived yet. But, he knew. Alex knew the risks. He knew it was part of the job when he'd gone into peds, into surgery, into medicine. It was just hard to deal with sometimes.

"I was thinking, and Derek agrees," She starts, turning her head to him and he does the same, leaning back also. "We've moved out and my mom's house is just standing there."

"Yeah?" He asks, clearly distracted and not getting her point.

She fishes into the pocket of her coat and pulls out her set of keys. "You can have your key back."

"I thought you didn't want the interns hanging around there anymore?"

"Yeah, but- I can't sell it. It's my mom's house, Alex, my family." She places the key down in his hands and smiles, "And... you're part of my family."

If he was the kind to get emotional, he would. If he was the kind to hug people, he would. But he isn't, so he simply brightly smiles and wraps an arm around her shoulders.

"We've come such a long way." She speaks, reminding him of all of the dramas and joys in the past five years. They'd come much farther than they'd ever thought possible. Izzie and George were gone. Cristina had left.

Meredith had found her sister, and then lost her. She'd found the love of her life, and after so many problems, they'd finally found a rhythm and had created a family.

Alex had been married and gotten divorced, all in the same year. He'd come so far from the trashy home he grew up in.

Izzie had gotten cancer and had left.

George got hit by a bus and died.

Jackson and April came in and, after much hatred from the original group, had finally found a place in the hospital.

Cristina left, too distraught to stay in a place that reminded her of all the incredible losses.

Nothing was the same. People died. People left. Five years changes everything.

* * *

"It's good to know that you're alright, sweetie. I was worried when I heard about you failing your boards." Catherine tells her, scrubbing away at her hands.

April fakes a smile, "I'm fine, I'm great. Really. I really- I know what I'm doing this year. Last time it was just kind of... crazy."

"So I heard. Richard tells me that you and Jackson got into a bar fight?"

"Uh, yeah. This guy was just- he wasn't exactly being pleasant and I kinda punched him after he punched Jackson and I kinda lost it."

"You punched him?" She asks, her voice speaking with a hint of pride, "Honey, I didn't know you had it in you."

She sighs, raising her head and casting her attention to the woman, "Neither did I."

They stay in silence for a few more moments, washing away at their hands to scrub away the gunk and blood and germs.

"So, when did you sleep with my son?"

April suddenly perks up, nervously stuttering, "I- uh, we- What?" She squeaks, eyes wide and mouth open.

Catherine sends her an warning look, "Honey, I'm not an idiot. And Jackson's not as smart as he thinks he is if he thought he could keep this from me." She throws her cloth down after drying her hands and rests a hand on her hip, "It was him, right? Your first?"

The good discussion between the two quickly became awkward but the elder woman doesn't seem to care.

"I, uh- Yes." She has not other but to reply. Mrs. Avery is blocking the door, much to April's dismay because she wants nothing more than to escape the interrogation that's sure to follow.

"Was he careful with you?"

"This is extremely awkward."

She stops her, glancing around the room uncomfortably and Catherine chuckles.

"Oh, I'm not prying, I'm just curious. Don't worry, I'll stop." She smiles over at the younger doctor, "I'm quite happy for you, really. I have to stay, I was kind of rooting for it." She admits and April stares at her shockingly, "Just don't fail this time around."

Awkward conversation over.

* * *

"Your mother knows!" She calls out in the apartment, slamming the door with a lock and throwing her bag down on the floor.

She hears the background noise of the TV coming from the living room and peeks around the corner. Jackson's lay on the couch, an arm flung over his face as he watches the screen.

"What did she do?" He questions, moving slightly when she sits down on the other end, crossing her legs and leaning back against the cushions.

"She just came out with it. She already knew, Jackson. She knew, the whole day. And she's pretty pissed with you for not telling her." April informs him and he sighs, slowly sitting up and stretching his arms.

"That's a first."

She shifts for a second, pulling on the edges of her top, "She asked about it."

"About what?"

"My deflowering!" She screams, quickly admiring the floor when he laughs.

"Seriously? That's what we're calling it?"

She shrugs, "That's what I'm calling it. You can just say that time when you took your best friend's virginity."

"I didn't take, you gave."

She frowns, "That's the same thing." She turns her attention to the television for a second, glancing at the current episode of Friends that's playing. "Alex is moving out."

He raises an eyebrow, "Really?"

April nods, "Yep." She spins her head around to look at him again, "What?" She asks curiously when she notices the way he's staring at her.

The bashful yet playful look is toying on her face again and Jackson slowly moves over to her, lowering her down onto the couch. "You know what that means?" He teases with a smirk, resting himself above her.

She bites her lip and gawks at him as though she has no idea what he's talking about. "What?"

"It means..." Jackson starts as he leans down to kiss her jaw, "that we have the apartment to ourselves." He finishes, pressing kisses down her neck.

She moans out beneath him and runs a hand down his back, needfully gripping the bottom. "That's right."

He runs his hands up her legs as she pulls them up his sides. He pushes the straps of her top down her and gently kisses her shoulder, "You wanna do it again?"

April pants against him, gripping the edges of his top and pulling it over his chest hungrily.

"Yeah, kinda." She understates.

He smirks and grips her hips as he kisses her mouth, his lips spreading open her own. Her hands travel down his toned torso before hooking into the rim of his pants and tugging him closer to her and he groans when she giggles against him, gripping his shoulders.

"Bedroom?"

"Too far."


	5. Chapter 5

**So, these new spoilers really aren't doing it for me so I feel like I need to make you guys (and myself) feel better. I'm going to try and update more often to fill the void that's sure to follow on-screen but expect the paramedic guy to make an appearance here, but he won't be as prominent as he probably will be int he show because I think it's a safe bet about him being there to woo April. No more interns though, only Jo and maybe Shane. Anyhoo, enjoy and review!**

* * *

Cristina returns to work at the hospital on a Sunday.

She's missed the place a lot. The familiar faces of surgeons and nurses surprise her, she'd never thought that they'd be such an important piece of her life, but she's glad to find them, to see them again.

"Cristina!" Meredith calls from behind her and catches up, a smile on her face as she walks beside her friend. "How's it feel?"

Yang shrugs, eyeing the hallway, "Honestly, I thought it'd look different."

"What do you mean?"

"Nostalgia and all that. Attending's no different than resident here, it's strange. It thought it'd be like- changed."

"Well, we've changed, so... Work with that."

They walk into the attending's lounge and Bailey perks up at the table. "Yang! I heard you were back."

"Yeah. Yes, I am. All charged and ready to go."

She tries her best to sound enthusiastic, swinging her fist up in the air like a champion but Bailey raises an eyebrow and don't buy it for a second.

Bailey brushes it off though, standing from her chair and stuffing her hands into the pockets of her jacket before heading out, "You make a mess, you clean it out. Just like everybody else."

Alex enters the room, crunching down on his apple, closely followed by Jackson and April. They all sit down at the table and Alex puts his fit up on the desk, swinging around in his chair. "Yang! Couldn't handle the cold?" He teases.

She fakes a smile, ignoring his question. She won't tell him that she left because she couldn't stand the people, and that the only person who mattered to her over there had passed away unexpectedly and she couldn't handle it. She couldn't take it and, as much as she wouldn't admit it, she missed these guys.

"Evil Spawn! Knock up any interns yet?" She jokes back with a smirk before rummaging for something in her bag. She checks her phone for any missed calls because Owen said that he'd call her before she started her shift. _No missed calls_. Glancing back up, a devilish smile erupts on her face when she catches the other two. "Hey, Kepner."

There's a hint of sarcasm in her voice and April picks up on it.

The redhead lifts her head from her salad and smiles, "Cristina."

"How's the sex?"

Jackson chokes back on his drink and Cristina laughs.

"Really?"

"Think about it this way," she starts, taking a seat beside the trauma attending, "At least you missed out on all the crappy teenage sex." She informs her, quickly turning her attention her to Jackson, "Unless Avery really can't deliver-"

"You know what?" He interrupts her, "I have patients. I will see you later." He makes up slightly, standing and hurrying out of the room, carefully avoiding her prying.

April watches the table again to ignore the woman but can feel her stare on her, "What? Go on, say it."

Cristina smiles, "Congrats."

April shakes her head, "Um, thanks?" She follows his lead out the doorway, "Welcome back."

"Don't get pregnant!" She calls out behind her as the redhead leaves the room and heads down the hall. She turns her attention to the other pair, "So, what else is new?"

* * *

"We have to stop doing this."

He falters for a second when she presses her hands on his chest and speaks the words.

"What?" He frowns, resuming his actions and untying the knot of the strings of her scrub bottoms.

He really wishes that she's not talking about what he thinks she is, because he wouldn't know how to handle that conversation.

"This." She begins, gripping the back of his neck with one hand and looking up into his eyes. Her right hand stops his from moving any more on her pants. "Having sex at work."

"What, you wanna just- Do it at home? Because I'm really busy and-""

She shakes her head and closes her eyes for a second, "I know, I know. Me, too. But it's-" She cuts herself off and sighs, "I had a patient the other day, an eight year old, and he kept asking me why I had bruises on my neck." She stops for a second to stare at him, and shrieks at the smirk on his face, "Those weren't bruises!"

He chuckles, leaning down to her neck and placing soft kisses on her skin with a grin, "Oh, you mean these?"

She fail to shrugs him off and lets herself get carried into him, "Yeah..." She groans, throwing her head back when he lifts the edges of her shirt and traces his lips further down her chest.

* * *

Half an hour later, she creeps out of the room, tidying up her hair.

"Doctor Kepner, incoming trauma. Barry Willow. Fell from ladder onto car windshield."

She rushes into the room, following Heather, her intern for the week.

The patient lies on the gurney, hands clasped by his sides. His head is in a brace with a piece of glass sticking into his forehead, and she spots a paramedic standing by his side.

"Hi, can you tell me what happened?" She asks politely, but the man just closes his eyes, unable to answer her, so she turns to the man beside him. "What happened?"

"He, uh-" He thinks for a second and scratches his forehead, "He was painting his house and the ladder slipped. The wife's car was beneath and he fell straight through the screen.

"OK."

She nods and ties her hair up quickly.

"It's gonna be a long day."

* * *

"Hey, have you seen April?" Jackson asks as he walks into the attending's lounge and Cristina raises her head.

"Kepner? She's in OR 2." She informs him, "Owen said she had some trauma or something. I don't know, that crap's boring. Why?"

He pulls a bottle of water from the fridge, "We were meant to go get a drink but I guess she's busy."

She nods and casts her eyes back down to her chart, "So, you and the Virgin Mary?"

Jackson chuckles, sitting down to face her, "Go on, hit me with it."

"No. I, uh-" Cristina starts, a sheepish grin on her face, "I have nothing to s- Really? Really, Avery?" She sounds almost shocked, as though she doesn't understand how it happened.

"Hey, you had your offer."

She laughs and shakes her head, "Oh, yes. Those three seconds were magical."

"Yeah, I really shouldn't drink." He tells himself.

Cristina goes to speak but her pager rings, and she stands up abruptly, pulling her charts up with her as she leaves.

She stops for a moment, swirling her words in her mouth seven times before finally speaking.

"Just make sure you don't hurt her."

Though she may not admit it at first, April's a friend and she knows just how fragile girls can be about sex.

"I don't plan to."

"Yeah, well, just make sure you want the same things."

It's the last thing she says before she leaves and it gets to him, much more than he wants it to.

What the hell is that supposed to mean?


	6. Chapter 6

_"Just make sure you want the same things."_

The words have been taking up his thoughts for the last week, spinning around and around to confuse him.

What the hell was that supposed to mean?

He knows that Yang's probably not the best person to get relationship advice from, granted, but she still has a point. Doesn't she?

What if April didn't want the same things as him? What if she felt differently than he did? What if she wasn't invested in this relationship enough for it to work? What if she wasn't all in?

Jackson throws his head back against the sofa and runs a hand over his head anxiously.

He can't think about anything but Cristina's _words of wisdom_ that keep flowing through his brain as if to tell him something. As if they had a greater meaning.

Maybe she's right, he thinks, maybe they do need to talk and make sure that they both want the same stuff, have the same intentions in mind.

It might be a smart idea, to find out where she's at emotionally. Because, him? He knows.

He's in. He's all in.

He's in this for the long haul. He can do this. He's ready. He's all in because he knows how he feels.

But the thought of her not feeling the same is killing and eating away at him.

Luckily he's home alone, for once, so he has time to think everything over. April's out at Bailey's bachelorette party, hosted by Torres. God knows why she even wanted to go in the first place because everybody knows what a terrible drunk she is when she's had one too many beverages.

He chuckles to himself when he remembers the night she's punched that guy after just one glass of wine.

Oh, yeah. _That night._

The front door of their apartment suddenly flings open and slams again with a loud bang. He knows it's not Alex because he'd moved out a few days ago, so he figures that she must be home already.

So much for time to think.

"Jack-man?!" April shouts out, dropping her bag onto the living room floor. She grins when she spots him sat on the couch, a clearly amused look on his face because he knows she's tipsy. "You miss me?" She asks.

"How was the party?"

"Hot! There was a stripper and everything!"

Jackson laughs and stands up slowly, sighing a breath and grasping her arms lightly, "How about we get you to bed?"

He can't help the small smile that won't budge off of his face the whole time because she's an adorable drunk. Well, he thinks so, at least.

April bites her lip and stares up at him, "I think..." she starts, cupping his face between her hands and running them down his torso until they rest on the waistband of his jeans, "that's a very good idea." She slips her hand beneath the material and smirks when she takes a hold of him.

He grabs her wrist gently and pulls her hand away. April frowns and pouts.

"You're drunk, and-"

"And horny." She finishes for him, giggling and gripping onto his shirt as she almost falls to the floor in her fit of laughs.

He shakes his head and brings her back up straight, "That's..." he begins, trying to find the right words, "hot." It's true though, Drunk Kepner turns him on, "But you're wasted and I am not going to take advantage of you."

The redhead tugs on his shirt and pulls him closer, "Oh, but you can. You can take advantage. Go ahead. Please." She's almost begging, and a slight part of knows that Sober Kepner would be humiliated. Her eyes get darker and her voice gets quieter and he's almost convinced that she's falling asleep. "I'm only about 10% wasted, so that means I'm around 90% sober." She sounds somewhat more serious and less inebriated. "Take advantage."

She stares up at him, her eyes boring into his and she's practically demanding him to.

"Apri-"

A finger suddenly places itself against his lips and she shushes him. When she knows he won't say anything to stop her, her hands move to her shoulder and she slowly pulls her jacket away to toss it onto the ground.

The room's ridiculously dark and hot, and he's finding it very hard to stop her.

Very, very _hard_.

He's not going to feel bad about this. He won't even be taking advantage because she knows what she's doing. She wasn't as drunk as he first thought so she has to know what she's doing to him and his body.

Jackson looks down to see his belt hit the ground and her fingers move up his chest to play with the buttons of his shirt. "I want dessert." She undoes the fastenings until the last one and the button pops slowly.

He's not going to feel bad about this, because she knows _exactly_ what she's doing.

April moves her feet backwards slowly when he walks forwards, plastering her against the wall. He rests a hand beside her head and he's so dangerously close that she can barely breathe. But it's good, that incredibly great feeling of shortness of breath.

She gulps when he runs the palms of his hands up and down her sides, stopping just below her breasts. Her entire body feels as though it's covered in goosebumps and she knows that she'll never get enough of him touching her.

"Like really, really, excruciatingly good dessert."

She tells him what she wants, slipping out of her shoes and lazily pushing the shirt from his shoulders. Jackson raises an eyebrow and smirks, slipping a hand behind her back to unzip her dress. The thin straps loosen and he tugs the bottom of her dress up slightly in his hands as he rests his brows against hers.

"Yeah?"

She slowly nods and bites her bottom lip again as her hands grip his arms to hold him there. His mouth is dangerously close to hers and she can feel herself staring down at his lips with that devilish look in her eyes.

She gives in quickly, bringing him closer when he finally kisses her, his mouth smashing against hers hungrily.

A soft moan escapes past her lips when he trails his kisses down her neck and onto the skin of her collarbone, pushing away the straps of her dress. Her skin grows hot to his kiss, to his touch.

"We should-"

April nods, lifting her legs up around his waist so he can carry her down the hallway to his bedroom. She cups the back of his neck as he walks and slams her lips back down onto his, her tongue slipping hurriedly into his mouth.

Her bottom meets the mattress and he stands in front of her. Jackson leans down and latches his mouth onto the skin of the swell of her right breast, and she pushes the top of the material down to her waist before throwing her head back when he unclasps her bra and throws the garment aside.

He straightens back up and pulls the dress from her body completely before disposing of it. He goes to reach for the button of his jeans but she stops him and pulls down the zipper. April shuffles back up to the head of the bed and waits for him to follow her lead.

He hovers above her, taking in the sight of her bare breasts and tiny panties because he'll never get bored of her naked body. He can never get bored of kissing her, touching her, loving her.

She pulls her legs up at his sides when he grasps her hips and kisses his way down her chest before licking back up from her belly button to her neck. April cries out when he slicks his fingers beneath her underwear and touches her wet center. She arches her back and lets out a bodily moan when he slides a finger inside of her, followed by a second, a proud smile on his face as he watches her contort underneath him.

She's the only woman who ever came so easily for him and he loves that fact. It's probably because he can't get enough of her, and because he knows that he's the only one who's ever touched her like that.

"I- God!" She groans, gripping his shoulders when she lets go, digging her nails into his shoulder-blades. Her eyes fly open and she pants out deep breaths, "I-" She starts with a gulp, "You-"

"Yeah."

Her hands casually travel down his chest to his pants to push them down his legs for good. He kicks the jeans off and resumes his place above her. She rests a hand on the back of his neck and the other traces the line of hair down his abdomen until she slips her hand under the waistline of his black briefs.

"You, uh-" He starts but swallows a breath to gather himself when she cups him and stares up at his face with that wicked glint and smile.

She bats her eyelashes a few times and bites her lip innocently, "Uh huh?"

Jackson doesn't reply, only stiffs a groan when she shifts her body upward to push up against him. He carefully slides the palms of his hands down her sides and hooks his thumbs under the rim of her underwear before pulling them down her legs at a speed so slow that she feels like she might die before they come off.

The tiny garment hits the floor beside the bed and he rids himself of his boxers. April closes her eyes for a brief second before focusing her brown eyes on his face completely, watching the way he stares down at her lips when he slowly enters her. Her arms slide under his to bring him closer and she grips the bed sheets to steady herself when he pulls her legs up to his sides so they move better and at a greater speed.

She pulls his face down to hers and presses her lips against his thirstily, her teeth tugging on his bottom lip when he tangles a hand through her hair, his fingers getting lost in her red curls.

"Ah," He groans, placing a hand down beside her head to keep himself up but he doesn't let go of her mouth, instead just separates her lips and slips his tongue between her teeth.

Her body writhes beneath him, her chest panting heavily as she finally orgasms after a while and he follows shortly after, slowing the speed and grasping her face to kiss her softly before he collapses down next to her on the bed.

"That was..." She voices, out of breath.

He nods, "Dessert."

* * *

His hand reaches out to slam down on his alarm clock at some time in the early morning.

It's a Saturday, which usually means big traumas lost of patients to tend to in a small amount of time, not exactly what he wanted to do with his day. Because, if he had his way, he'd lie here on his bed for the whole day along with April who could easily keep him company in more ways than one.

_Speaking of which._

Jackson glances down with a mix of a frown of confusion and a grin of joy when he sees her hand moving across his chest and she rests her palm on his hip. He turns his head and spots the redhead in question, a smile on her face as she watches him.

"You know, you're a very peaceful sleeper." She states, curling the corner of her lip, "I'd never noticed. It's adorable."

He raises an eyebrow and grabs her hand that lays on his stomach, "Adorable, really? Here I was thinking I was all strong and manly."

"Oh, you are. But you're adorable, too. And pretty." April teases, lifting herself up so she lays on her side. She curves her elbow and places her head in her hand, "It's actually the first thing I noticed about you. That's terrible, isn't it?"

He chuckles and shrugs, "That was the first thing? Not the eyes, or the classic Avery smile?" He grins down at her and she giggles when she recognizes the look.

"Yeah, that smile."

Jackson brushes a strand of hair behind her ear and fawns up at her face, "Do you wanna know what I first thought about you?"

She shakes her head, "Nah, I don't think so. It was probably mean because no one liked me during our intern year, and I'm guessing you joined in."

"I liked you." He tells her sincerely, practically cutting her off because he felt the urge to tell her, possibly to stop her from doubting herself and her like-ability. "I did. You were, you know- You didn't see me for my name. You never brought up my family and I liked that. You only called me out when I did something wrong or disrespectful and I appreciated the fact that someone had the balls to do that because everyone else was too afraid. I mean, yeah, you were louder than most of us, and neurotic and sometimes a little overbearing but... I liked you, April."

Her faces lights up and she glances down at the bed as though she's self-conscious "Really?"

"Yes." He informs her, "And the first thing... it was-" He almost doesn't want to tell her anymore. "It was your boobs."

She slaps his arm and gasps, "My boobs?"

"It wasn't my fault." He holds his hands up in defense and rolls onto his side as well to face her. "It was the first day and I was hanging out with Charles and we were, like, scanning the place. And I remember, he saw Reed and said she was hot and then he saw you and... said you'd obviously had a boob job."

"What?!" She shrieks, her arms flying up to cover her chest as if it's make a difference.

He laughs, "So, of course, you know, I looked. And you had nice boobs."

"Had?"

"Have."

"And I did not have a boob job!"

He smiles and shakes his head, resting a hand on her waist, "Believe me, I know." He taunts, looking down at her breasts and smirking, "Any chance you wanna give me a reminder?"

April rolls her eyes and smacks his chest before throwing a leg over his body and straddling his waist. The covers ride down her back and she's completely naked for him. He reminds himself that it doesn't happen much because she's clearly still got confidence issues, no matter how many times he's told her that she looks amazing, clothed or not.

"You're lucky that you're pretty." She jokes, leaning down to kiss his mouth with a smile.

Jackson mumbles against her lips an _'uh huh'_ to agree with her and runs his hands up and down her back.

She pulls away for a second before trailing kisses down his neck and chest, "You know what I've never done?"

He raises an eyebrow suggestively, clearly getting her hint and tone, "You-"

April nods, biting her lip and placing her hands on his stomach as she kisses her way down his body.

He grabs the pillow behind his head for hold because he knows what she's going to do and he really doesn't want to touch her skin during because he'll loose it, in a good way.

Her lips travel lingeringly down his chest, kissing and nibbling, until she reaches his pelvis, above the band of his briefs. That carnal glint reappears in her eyes again and he sighs a breath when she grips the edge of material to pull them down.

"Dude, you got-"

The door abruptly flies open and April shrieks, her reflexes quickly sending her off the edge of the bed and onto the floor, her shoulder hitting a wooden table on the way.

"Ow!"

Jackson reacts suddenly, pushing down the covers to her on the ground.

"Ah! Dude, seriously?! I did not want to see that!" Alex claims, covering his face and grimacing.

"What the hell, you moved out!" Jackson reminds him. He stands up from the bed and April rises up beside him, the bed covers shielding her body.

She covers her face, clearly embarrassed, and stares down at the floor, avoiding all eye contact with Karev for the sake of her sanity.

"Yeah, well, I got some of your mail mixed in with mine, whatever."

"Key back. Now." Jackson demands.

He throws the letter and key down on the bed and turns to leave before stopping himself with a small smirk, "And, really, Kepner? It's five o'clock in the morning."He teases, slamming the door shut behind him on his way out.

April rubs a hand over her face and sits down on the bed in a hump of covers, "Oh, God." She whines and Jackson stays silent for a moment, trying to decide what to say.

He sits down beside her and nods his head a few times for the sake of it before sending her a suggestive face, as if to continue.

"You wanna-"

"No."

He nods, "Didn't think so."


	7. Chapter 7

The smell of sweet coffee wakes him and he sits up in bed, rubbing a hand over his face to keep himself into gear. He slips off of the bed and pulls his boxers up his legs before wandering into the kitchen.

He spots April stood at the table, pouring a cup of the warm beverage and flicking through the newspaper.

"That smells nice." He tells her, slipping his arms around her waist and pulling her back against him. He drops his head onto her shoulder, "And you smell delicious."

The redhead giggles, letting go of the paper and tilting her head to glance at him, "That's called 'having a wash'. You might wanna try it." She teases, patting his cheek and sipping on her coffee. Jackson grins and pulls the cup from her grasp before walking around the room to the other side of the table.

She frowns, "I just poured that!"

"Well, pour another one." He tells her with a smirk on his face when she creases her forehead and sighs, reaching for the coffee pot.

"You could at least put on a shirt." She picks up her mug and blows down on the hot liquid as she stares at him with a slight blush.

Jackson watches the way she bites her lip and stops herself from eyeing his chest. "Why, is this a problem?" He jokes, glancing down at his toned physique with a smirk, "Because I thought you liked-"

She cuts him off, shaking her head, "I do. I love it, all of it. But I have to leave for work soon and you're tempting me." It's true. She's meant to be getting ready for work, for saving people, but her boyfriend's partially naked body is distracting her and she can't keep her thought straight. How the hell does someone look like that? She thinks it unreal and ridiculous that she gets him all to herself.

"Oh, really?" He asks smugly and sets down his mug and walks back over to her, his hands resting on her hips. April scratches the back of her head and shifts comfortably. She slides a hand past him to rest her cup down on the table before resting her hands on his shoulders.

"I don't have time."

He raises an eyebrow, "Five minutes?" He quips, eyeing her lips impatiently. He really wants to kiss her right now, to feel her against him, to touch her. If only for a short period of time.

She loosens her arms and moves her hands down his chest, seeming to give in. He smiles and tugs on the edges of her shirt to pull it upwards, and she follows his lead, throwing the cloth onto the floor. "We have to be quick." He nods against her neck as he places kisses down her throat and she grasps the back of his neck when he picks her up, her legs wrapping around him.

"I can try." He tries and she laughs while pushing her jeans down her legs in a hurry. He cups her face between his hands and presses his lips against hers hurriedly as he sits her down on the kitchen table.

"Here?" She squeaks as she pulls away, the all-too-familiar innocent look reappearing on her face. He's seen it before, probably over a hundred times, but lately he's realized that he can wipe it off her face within a matter of seconds.

"We can do it in the men's room but not in our own kitchen?" He asks, running a hand up her back.

April falters for a second, "But it's a kitchen. Doesn't that break like a thousand rules of hygiene?"

It's not the fact that she doesn't want to do it in the kitchen. In fact, the idea seems insanely hot and appealing to her. But her mind, the small part of her that thinks it's gross and dirty, is telling her otherwise, so she tries her best to ignore the incredibly warm feeling rising up her body when he unclasps her bra presses his lips to her shoulder softly.

"Men's room..." He whispers to remind her, a cocky grin on his face.

She nods, remembering that one time in the not-so-sanitary cubicle. He has a point, she knows he has a point, so she gives up, clearly accepting the fact that she won't win this petty little argument, "Good point."

Her hands just about manage to creep behind his back to pull him closer before her pager beeps, breaking the feeling of his tongue against her skin. April groans, and Jackson backs away from her holds his hands up with a disbelieving frown, "I give up!"

She giggles and hops off the table, picking up her discarded clothes from the floor. She quickly re-dresses and checks her pager, "Trauma."

"Why couldn't you have chosen gyno or something?" He asks, leaning his forearms on the table and staring at her as he sips his coffee.

She spins around and smiles, "They're no fun. Trauma's exciting." Slipping past him, she rests a hand on his shoulder and picks up her bag from the counter.

Jackson turns, gripping her waist and raising an eyebrow, "Yeah, but you get more free time." He reminds her suggestively, pushing her hair behind her ear and kissing her forehead.

"Oh, so I should make my career choices based on how often you wanna have sex?" April quips, smacking a hand on his chest lightly to push him away. The grin on her face doesn't go unnoticed and he smirks.

"Like that's a problem." He teases, clearly hinting to her quasi-constant need for him. She gasps when he taps her behind before hurrying off down the hallway to the bathroom.

"Yeah, run away!" She calls after him, a girly grin covering her face.

She doesn't move for a second, instead she just stands in place and creases her forehead.

Can she do this?

Can she do this every day for the rest of her life?

Can she picture herself waking up to him every morning?

Can she imagine little children running around with the combination of their genes?

She likes to think she can. It's a nice picture. It's a perfect picture. The kind of thing she'd imagined her whole life. The family with the kids, and the dog, and the big white picket fence with the colourful flowers in the garden. It's what she pictured as a little girl, what she thought of as a teenager, what she wanted as an adult.

And, now? Now that everything was different than the way she originally would have liked, now that everything she'd ever planned for her future had changed, she couldn't picture anything else. She couldn't imagine another future for herself apart from the one with him in it.

And that picture? The one with the kids, the dog, and the big white picket fence with the colourful flowers in the garden? That picture was just the background.

* * *

"Kepner, you want my fries?" Alex offers her, holding out the plastic container.

She shakes her head with a soft smile, "No, thanks." The idea of food is kind of making her want to puke and she doesn't think she can handle it, "I'm not that hungry."

Cristina frowns, noticing the disgusted and drained look on April's face, "What's up with you?"

"I'm fine. I'm OK."

"Ask her what she was doing with Avery this morning." Alex nudges Cristina with a knowing smirk.

April shrieks, "No, don't. Let's never bring that up." They already humiliate her enough as it is, she really doesn't want another layer added onto that, another thing or them to mock her for.

Yang laughs with a shocked loom on her face, "Kepner!"

The redhead lets her head fall into her hands and sighs. _Great._

"In the morning? Really?" Cristina asks, a sarcastic tone to her words. "Were you curious?"

"Enough! OK?! Yes, I was going to- Yes! Can you please just leave me alone, for once? Would it kill you? Would it actually kill you to stop making fun of me for just a second? Huh, would it? Besides, whatever I do in my bedoom is none of your god damned business so just stop!"

Alex sends her a weird glance and Cristina backs down, "Geez, sorry."

April pants out, standing from her seat. She wishes she hadn't because as soon as she does the feeling of vomit is back and she quickly hurries over the bin. She holds her hair back and coughs over the waistbin, spewing her guts up. She doesn't notice when Jackson enters the room until he starts talking and mentions her name, "Anybody see April?"

Cristina and Alex don't reply, instead just point to the woman hurdled with her face over the bin.

He rushes over to her, resting a hand on her back and taking her hsir from her grasp to take over, "Are you okay?" She glances up at him with a slight nod and smile.

"Peachy."

He chuckles, "Do you want me to get you anything?" She shakes her head and he sighs, rubbing his hand up and down her back soothingly to calm her. "Do you want to go for a lie down?"

April nods slowly, lifting her head and going to wipe her mouth with the back of her hand. He hands her a tissue and she gladly accepts it, cleaning her face.

"Yeah, I'm sure you're going to go to sleep." Alex jokes out behind them as they leave the attendings' lounge.

April doesn't have it in her to correct him, to call him out, and Jackson figures he'll just beat the crap out of him later if he has to.

Cristina looks over at her friend, a curious and slightly confused frown playing on her face "How did you know about this morning, anyway?"

Karev stares at her blankly, "Eh... I gotta go." He quickly escapes from the room, taking his bowl of french fries with him.

She laughs as he leaves, shouting after him, "Perv."


End file.
